Manly-Men
I've now had enough conversations where women have pointed out who they thought were manly men and I constantly answer, "Really? You're kidding right? You think that guys manly?" The basic idea I was getting from them was that a manly man dresses tough/rugged and is a cocky jerk.
So I've decided to post my definition of what I consider a "manly man" to be and if you are so inclined you can see if it matches your definition and then share it with me or just comment. Whatever.
I'll start with an example and work from there.
You're at a crowed bus stop. There are a lot of people. You think you may not get a seat. There's a guy standing just apart from the crowd. He is dressed in an understated way. Not fashionable but not so much so as to be comical. There is some recognition of the meaning of presentation but he's obviously not preoccupied with it. His fashion statement will likely say "dependable". He is obviously waiting for the bus but is not crowded around the stop like every one else. He's not exactly lost in thought in fact he's subtly taking stock of the situation as much as you are. When the bus finally comes he's still waits a bit off to the side to let everyone else get on. He knows this will likely mean that he will have to stand but it doesn't matter. He knows it won't kill him. He prefers to make sure everyone else has a seat plus if something goes wrong he's in a better position to lend a hand.
The basic concept here is that a manly man is a guy who is interested in the well being of others and is prepared to do what it takes to make it so even at the cost to himself. Not stupidly. He won't foolishly throw his life away or bring unnecessary harm to himself. He's about getting the job done not melodrama and he gets the job done without much fanfare. As little as possible is the goal. My bus example was a bit banal but I wanted to point out an every day occurrence where you might have seen this kind of man but it may never had occurred to you see him as manly.
So that's my take on it. I'm really interested on hearing from people on this.
So I've decided to post my definition of what I consider a "manly man" to be and if you are so inclined you can see if it matches your definition and then share it with me or just comment. Whatever.
I'll start with an example and work from there.
You're at a crowed bus stop. There are a lot of people. You think you may not get a seat. There's a guy standing just apart from the crowd. He is dressed in an understated way. Not fashionable but not so much so as to be comical. There is some recognition of the meaning of presentation but he's obviously not preoccupied with it. His fashion statement will likely say "dependable". He is obviously waiting for the bus but is not crowded around the stop like every one else. He's not exactly lost in thought in fact he's subtly taking stock of the situation as much as you are. When the bus finally comes he's still waits a bit off to the side to let everyone else get on. He knows this will likely mean that he will have to stand but it doesn't matter. He knows it won't kill him. He prefers to make sure everyone else has a seat plus if something goes wrong he's in a better position to lend a hand.
The basic concept here is that a manly man is a guy who is interested in the well being of others and is prepared to do what it takes to make it so even at the cost to himself. Not stupidly. He won't foolishly throw his life away or bring unnecessary harm to himself. He's about getting the job done not melodrama and he gets the job done without much fanfare. As little as possible is the goal. My bus example was a bit banal but I wanted to point out an every day occurrence where you might have seen this kind of man but it may never had occurred to you see him as manly.
So that's my take on it. I'm really interested on hearing from people on this.
posted by Urban Shaman at 9:05 AM
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