See What Can Happen

So last night I go and have a reverse nightmare. I call it that because in a nightmare the fear you experience eventually comes to a point where you are so overstimulated you wake up and in the case of a nightmare you just sit there shaking until the fear goes away and glad that it was only a dream. In the case of a reverse nightmare you experience so much happiness that eventually you become over stimulated and you wake up but with a good feeling but are sad to realize it was just a dream and now it's over.

I was going to exclude dreams like seeing a dead loved one or some other kind of wish fulfillment dream but I decided not to. I gave it some thought and realized that the only reason I was going to exclude them was because my reverse nightmare came from an "innocent" and "harmonious" place and not some deep unfulfilled longing. The last of my personal demons went with my saying my goodbye in my last post and with wrapping up an "adventure" I was having with someone I basically only know through e-mail (I know what she looks like and I've read some of the things she's written which is why I e-mailed her in the first place.) Saying goodbye to my little "alter ego" was the end of the adventure. My fellow adventurer's courageous and open personality inspired me to finally be rid of my remaining personal demons.

In the reverse nightmare I was vacationing in the city where she lives and I happen to cross paths with her at some unknown place so I decided I was going to approach her and say hello. I figured she shouldn't recognize me but I do it anyway. To my surprise she sees me approach and says hello first. I'm surprised because like I said I didn't think she would recognize me. When I ask she explains she recognizes me from the picture in my profile and was looking forward to one day meeting me in person. All of this makes me very happy. She finishes her explanation by coming to give me a hug. That's when I wake up. I feel a bit ripped off. I would have liked to have had the hug even if it was only in a dream. I would have felt more ripped off but I was so excited about having such a happy dream in the first place. Normally when I have happy dreams there has always been at least some expectation of disaster which often took place because that would be where my frame of mind would take the dream. However in this case it was just purely a peaceful happiness.

So I titled this "See What can Happen" because up until that dream I've never had enough happiness within myself to enjoy things as they come without ruining it with feeling ripped off when the happiness went away. Now I have the gift of happiness. If you put effort into something important to you, you will be rewarded sometimes in unexpected ways.

Keep in mind I'm easily pleased;)